The Princess and the Pea

In a land not so unlike our own, and in a time not so distant from today, ruled a true, good queen, benevolent and understanding. She was beloved by her people, yet she had no heir. This worried the queen, for who would follow as queen after her? Would the next queen be kind and caring toward her people, or would she be selfish and unjust? The queen could not leave such a momentous matter up to the whims of the fates, so she set out on a journey to lands near and far in search of a princess. Such a task may seem fairly simple, as princesses have always been easy to find, but the queen was in search of something more elusive: a true princess, one who would rule with kindness and care.

And this, dear reader, is where we find our queen. During her search, the queen comes upon a village having its yearly festival. Naturally, everyone turns out for a village festival, so perhaps the queen might find a true princess here. Princesses she finds, but they are selfish and uncaring, not true princesses. Just before leaving, the queen notices with great interest a beggar girl caring for young children in need. But for her lack of royal blood, she would make a wonderful heir to her kingdom. Having traveled far and wide without success, the queen returns to her castle, wishing she could have found a princess with a heart like that of the caring beggar girl.

Through her travels, the queen meets many princesses, some who might be true, and some who are quite obviously not. But just visiting their lands is not enough to find an undoubtedly true princess. She needs a foolproof test. Surely, the queen thinks, a true princess is one who is caring and loving toward her subjects. She would be sensitive and perceptive. But how could one test for that?

After much thought, she has an epiphany: a pea, of course! A true princess, a truly sensitive soul, would be able to notice when something as small and insignificant as a pea was placed beneath her while she slept; after all, nothing, and nobody, is small and insignificant to a true princess.

With the help of her chambermaid, the queen has the test prepared: one tiny pea underneath a mountain of mattresses. Only the most sensitive soul would notice it. The queen proclaims an invitation across the lands for princesses far and wide to come and visit her. Many answer her call, including some the queen had met on her travels, even some the queen can tell are not true princesses; but the queen is obliging, hosting them nevertheless. Of course, these coarse souls fail the test. Indeed, every princess fails the test! The queen falls into despair; does there not exist anywhere, even one truly good and sensitive princess?

The next evening is as dark as the queen’s despairing mood, her hope for finding a true princess ever dwindling. A knock sounds from the castle door. Answering the call, the queen recognizes the kind beggar girl from the village. Showing the extraordinary girl all hospitality, the queen despairs even more, if only the kind girl were a princess. Yet, what is this? The girl tosses off her tattered cloak to reveal that she is indeed a princess! The queen forces herself not to rejoice prematurely; for the girl must still pass the test of the pea. The queen invites the girl to stay the night, sleeping atop the towering feather bed and one tiny pea. In the morning, the queen waits expectantly. The princess is in good spirits but looks exhausted. The queen, with barely concealed excitement, asks how the girl slept. Terribly! She slept terribly! The queen is overjoyed, having at last found her true princess!

Now this calls for a grand celebration!